Confession: I stole this photo from CNN’s article on Ms. Dean
Your kid isn’t a real Christian. She’s faking it. And so is her brother.
That’s the warning issued by Kenda Creasy Dean, author of the new book (you knew it right?) Almost Christian.
Dean, a professor at Princeton Theological Seminary, came to her conclusions after interviewing 3,300 American teens between the ages 13 and 17 about their faith. Dean reportedly discovered that the teens were inarticulate and indifferent about their faith.
Duh. If she thinks teens are inarticulate she ought to spend a little time trying to read the online comment section of ESPN or CNN.
The author says this inability to articulate their faith is proof that American teens are embracing “moralistic therapeutic deism.” Listen, I’m an old woman with a college degree, who has penned a few books and I still had to look that up. I don’t know a single soul in my community, other than my husband, who uses words like that.
The people I know say things like “Git in the truck” or “You et chet? When they speak of God they refer to him as “Our Father” or “Creator” or the old-fashioned “Papa.” If you were to tell one of them that you think their teen is a Deist, they would just assume you are using some cuss word you picked up at the Mall. They might kick your butt for talking bad about their kid that way.
Best I can tell, the author is saying that teens today just don’t get it. Teens don’t yet understand that being a Christian – a real one versus a fake one – means trusting God even when the creek rises and your dog drowns and your mama runs off with the preacher and your daddy sits around the house all day watching Oprah and Extreme Home-Makeover reruns and crying. Dean said it a little different than I did but I went to one them there state schools best known for teaching people how to drive a John Deere tractor.
The suggestion that America’s teens are fake Christians will come as no surprise to most parents. What else do you expect from a generation raised on fake reality TV, in a society that encourages girls and boys alike to outfit themselves with fake boobs and fake booty? (I wonder if Dean knows that booty-boosting panties are the latest advancement in falsies. I try to keep up on all the latest fashion trends. Hot pants haven’t made a come-back since Jeannie C. Riley’s Harper Valley P.T.A. fell off the charts).
The author seems downright indignant about the findings of her study. She even points fingers. (Apparently, that Princeton education didn’t teach her the finger-pointing rule: When you point a finger at someone, there’s three more coming back in your direction.) She says the reason today’s teens are so fake is because “Churches don’t give them enough to be passionate about.”
Y’all forgive me, I don’t mean to be ugly, but there comes a time when a girl needs to speak plainly so as not to confound the educated: Ms. Dean, you need to crawl out from that cubicle and circulate more. Meet some real people.
Meet my daughter who, for a year now, has served as a mentor to a 7-year-old girl. They get together and read books. It may not seem like much to you but for that little girl, those meetings are the highlight of her week. She hates her own mama for going off to prison and abandoning her, but she loves my daughter.
Meet my buddy John’s son. He is an artist and an Eagle Scout. He can talk about his faith in fifty different ways. He learned it from his daddy, I guess. His daddy volunteers with Meals-on-Wheels and writes me stories about the people he meets there.
Or my buddy Kevin who used to write for the Wall Street Journal. This past year, Kevin and his daughter Hannah wrote a book together, The Power of Half. It’s the story of how Hannah,15, challenged her parents to sell their fine home in Atlanta and to give half of the proceeds away. They are using the monies to help build wells to sustain 30 villages in Ghana.
You may have heard of the comedian Jeff Foxworthy? He’s a funny, funny man, but his daughter Jordan? She is as serious as a heart attack. Jordan was 14 when she made her first trip to Kenya and held babies dying of malaria. Jordan decided she was going to be the change she wanted to see in the world, so she raised $500,000 by Tweeting her friends and asking them to donate $10 help these children. I bet if you had bothered to ask Jordan about her faith, you’d have found her to be articulate. I bet she could have schooled you in a thing or two.
You probably never heard of Whitney Ferrin. Whitney was a high school student when she learned that there were 900 homeless youth in Salem, Oregon. Whitney was rightly distressed by that – imagine, 900 homeless kids in the same town where legislators gather to hack away at the schools budgets. Whitney knew she couldn’t rely on those politicians, so she and some friends from church started the I Give a Shirt Foundation (igiveashirt.org). Ten dollars will buy you a snazzy tee. The proceeds are then used to help buy homeless teens the clothes they need. Whitney and her friends have helped outfit hundreds of homeless teens.
Really, Ms. Dean, I am sure you meant no harm by your little survey but you’ve done American teens a huge disservice, not to mention the local churches, youth groups, and youth service organizations working so hard to do the right thing, the God thing.
Maybe the kids you interviewed were intimidated by your education. Maybe you were too harsh to judge. Maybe you only reported on what you wanted to find. I don’t know but you got it wrong. I put 24,000 miles on my car this year traveling from Bennettsville, South Carolina, to Mobile, Alabama, to Phoenix, Arizona, to Bend, Oregon. All along the way I met American teens who understand what it means to be a real Christian. Some of them even consider me a real friend and that brings real tears to my eyes.
They probably wouldn’t have time to answer your survey questions, though. They are way too busy trying to live out their faith the way Jesus did, serving others in deed, and not word only.
(Editor’s note: This story continues at http://karenzach.com/2010/more-on-fakes/)
(If you know of a teen who is living out their faith, tell us about them)
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I repent in sack cloth and ashes for being quick to pass the other article forward.
Thank you, Karen. Fake Christians have been around since Judas, Aninias, and Saphira. This is not news. It’s much better to focus on those whose faith is real. Stories like the ones you told here are far more interesting than the CNN article cited above. I can’t imagine that Dean’s book would hold my interest for long.
Good thing there’s forgiveness.
AMEN and AMEN Karen – I know all of us could give her some names of teens she should have talked to! Loved your last line about why they are too busy to talk to her!!!!!!!
I love your comments! I was laughing out loud at the first ones and then hoping Ms. Dean gets to read your examples of caring teens. Plus your advice to circulate and meet some real teens.
This kind of article and generalizations about a certain group of people really bothers me. My kids aren’t “faker” Christians. Kenda Creasy Dean needs to get out in the real world. Not sure where she got her info – but 3,300 kids certainly doesn’t speak for a whole generation of teens! Good grief!
I agree with so much of what you wrote, KSZ. I read the article before I read yours and came away with some of the same feelings. But Dean does make the distinction that some churches (evangelical and Mormon) do a better job at instilling passion in teens. Are the teens you listed here members of mainline high churches or non-denoms or evangelical churches or something else? I think Dean makes a point there there is a large demographic of teens that experiences “church” but has not been equipped to talk about it.
I have a slightly different take on this one, guys. I do think that 3,300 kids is a large enough statistical sample from which to draw some conclusions, given that the survey questions were well-crafted. And I do believe that we live in an era in the modern church where a sort of moralistic deism (look at my fancy talk–and I’m from a town with one red light, Karen!)is a better description of the spiritual purview of many who call themselves Christians than a personal relationship with Christ. (See Groeschel, The Christian Atheist) For me, it’s not such a huge leap to believe that this type of thinking is prevalent among teens, when I see all around me that it’s prevalent among their parents. I did, however, enjoy your anecdotal evidence to the contrary. It’s always encouraging to see believers who get it.
Dana: I don’t doubt for a minute that there are kids out there who, in the newness of their faith or in the drudge of tradition, don’t yet understand the depth and breadth of what it “really” means to be a Christian. But I think suggesting that a survey represents some sort of crisis of faith in American teens is, well, I can’t say it here.
As a journalist, I know how flawed such statistical gathering can be — we only have to look to election years to see that.
I don’t think the stories I’ve provided are out of the norm. In fact, more than any other time, I think today’s teens are stepping into the gaps created by parents and grandparents who checked out.
Is there room for improvement in the church, sure. Still, I have witnessed the remarkable — I have seen kids who in the face of great despair have grabbed hold of a vision that’s bigger than themselves, and are asking the God of Creation for help.
Mandy:
I think there is a large demographic of people who talk more about living than actually do the living.
Just because a 14-year-old can’t speak to the specifics of their faith journey doesn’t mean they are fake Christians, whatever that is.
I think it’s unrealistic to put the burden of proof off on a teen that way.
Who are we to judge whether they are real Christians are not?
I can tell you as a young Christian, I likely would not have passed that survey but my faith was tender and it has carried me oh these many years now.
It’s probably a fair sampling but the thing is God doesn’t lump us together. He takes us heart by heart. I think it’s dangerous to diminish the faith of a child.
I wish Ms. Dean knew the kids I know.
I suspect that Dean’s book will get plenty of attention.
I’m thinking that if living congruently with the values and actions of Jesus is a measure of people’s difference to their faith, then perhaps Ms. Dean’s next sampling group should be in the 33 – 77 year grouping. Morally diestic to be sure but seeing the relational wars between who has and who does not hold the appropriate “truth,”, the ready embrace of manna as the measure of God’s favor, and the general apathy toward the world’s brokenness by us who should care more deeply, I’m not much convinced of the general therapeutic value of the faith she might discover.
Sometimes its all a boy to do to git up the fishin’ nets and head down to the river.
Such is the picture of my faith, in all of the tumbling, bumbling, flawed struggle that it is. Yet, trustin’ that somehow in that mix, there is grace. And trustin’ that in their own struggle, there a few teenagers out there who are the true disciples of the future … and the present.
Is Dean correct? Well, that’s “a big 10-maybe, good buddy”. The term “culture Christian” was coined before the kids Dean interviewed were born. 500 years ago, Martin Luther observed what he called both the visible church and the invisible church. In every generation there have been lukewarm people, lukecold people and passionate, sincere people. There have also been people who are passionately and sincerely wrong. Likewise, the kingdom of God is not synonymous with the church or churches. Still, some of it exists there.
Have there been failures and gaps in transmitting the faith? Assuredly! That’s true of many things about civilization, however. Likewise, there are miraculous and brilliant signs of the working of the Spirit that seem to defy explantion. To quote another bit of wisdom from the old German that I memorized over 50 years ago will carry for life (among many others) from Luther’s expalantion of the Third Petition of the Lord’s Prayer: Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
What does this mean? Luther wrote, “The good and gracious will of God is done indeed without our prayer; but we pray in this petition that it may be done among us also.” (Concordia Publishing House, 1943 edition)
Amen, may it be so. Yet the church and the older generation that gave me this foundation was nearly blind to segregation and Civil Rights and speechless in the face of growing materialism and the agonizing years of the Vietnam War. But everybody in it had memorized the same Catechism I had.
We do well to always be about repentance, renewal and redemption knowing that perfection is not what saves us but grace.
Love that last line, Roger.. beautiful thoughts
Yep, I hear ya.
My prayer: Thank you Father for your love, your mercy, your blessings and your forgiveness.
Help us to be examples in faith for our children and for our friends, teenagers included.
Give us grace to lead them in the right direction.
Another good example is Austin Gutwein who started Hoops of Hope (hoopsofhope.org). Your “Harper Valley PTA” comment made me smile. I loved that song when I was a kid.
A merciful prayer from a shining example of devotion. Thanks, Lillian
Thanks Cassie. Had not heard of this group. RE: PTA. Why does that not surprise me?
Which river do we find you at Steve?
In reality, the Lumber River with my Lumbee brethren and sistern. Metaphorically, where ever is the other side of the boat.
Karen,
Your post is an embarrassment for you’ve based it off a half-cocked reading of a single news article without even looking into the nature of the research, much less the book that Kenda Dean has written. As a result you’ve failed to to understand even the basic thrust of Almost Christian (Dean’s book) or the National Study of Youth and Religion (the ongoing study conducted by Christian Smith, University of Notre Dame) upon which Dean’s research is conducted.
Your assumptions (the nearly dozen I can count in your post) about what Dean is and isn’t saying are wildly incorrect. This should make your post almost humorous, but in fact it just makes it sad because you’ve just lambasted somebody who has her facts straight, has thought long and hard about the issues at hand, and has written a powerful if not prophetic wake-up call for churches and parents in one of the most decisively theological Christ-centered books of the year.
But you haven’t read it. Just seen the CNN article apparently.
I suggest you grab a copy before you say much else.
And I’ll be glad to help you track down her email when you need to write the apology.
Andrew:
I am sorry for embarrassing you.
But if you visit this blog long enough that will probably happen again. I have cultivated a knack for doing the wrong thing with the right heart.
Take this as a warning, however, this isn’t a place where people who like to be right about everything visit much. This is a place for discussion.
I’m happy to have you visit and share your insights, which, at least in this case, seem to carry a depth mine may lack.
That said, I appreciate you setting me straight. You’re right — I haven’t read the book. I have a pile of books beside my bed that I’m wading through, so forgive me. I doubt Dean’s book is one I would have naturally picked up seeing how my own four children are grown now and I don’t work in youth ministry. That said, I don’t back off my thoughts about what I did read.
Faith is a tenous thing, and we should respect it as such. When an article claiming today’s youth are faking their Christianity is published and forwarded by over 40,000 folks, I have a problem with that.
Kids are easy targets for societal ills. Hard to find a collective voice to fight back in the halls of academia when you are 15.
I couldn’t tell you if Dean’s book is prophetic or not. I’ll let you all decide that. But what I know for sure, without question, is that there are a ton of kids out there like Jordan Foxworthy and Hannah Salwen and Whitney Ferrin for whom faith is a very real thing. I wish we’d spend more time talking about them instead of lambasting pastors and youth leaders and Sunday School teachers and such.
And as far as parents needing to lead a more “radical” faith so to set the example of “real Christianity” I would venture to say the last thing kids need is one more radical in their lives. Most kids long for stablity, reliability and routine. Providing all that in this society may be the most radical thing a Christian parent can do.
Karen,
First, I think you’re absolutely right teens are plenty capable of knowing and following and serving Christ with all their hearts. However, I think Ms Dean is right too and what’s more I think she would 100% agree with you. I think that you misread her intention, which was not to deny that there are many, many teens on fire with faith in Christ; but to point out that, sadly, there are also many, many teens who might think of themselves as Christians but who have yet to have had the true Gospel preached to them, who have yet to truly encounter Christ.
I didn’t think when I read the article about Ms Dean’s book that she was selling teens short at all. Rather, the way I read it was as a condemnation of churches that sell teens short in the way we present the Gospel to them. I’ve seen it in my own church, and have spoken out against it and tried to be instrumental in changing the way we minister to teens. I’ve also heard about it in many other churches. I think it’s a tragedy; but I’m not going to put my head in the sand and deny the reality that Ms Dean writes about, which is not that teens can’t know Christ; but that they don’t know Christ. Many churches consistently underestimate what teens are capable of and we give them a weak, watered down drink in the place of the wine of Truth that Christ entrusted to us. I suppose you are blessed to not have encountered this phenomenon in your own community; but I have seen it. I have argued with the youth ministers and told them I though their approach was wrong. I think my pastor and my former pastor are both good men but also have a blind spot when it comes to how they approach the teens in our community. I think it’s a sickness that my church desperately needs to address because I hear about it from friends all over the country that it is the same in their communities. There are certainly still great teens whose parents have done a wonderful job despite the lack of support from the church; but I think families deserve better. I think we as a church need to seriously consider how many of our teens are active and engaged. Because even one teen who doesn’t really know the love and power and truth of Christ but instead thinks of God as some sort of detached moral authority figure is one teen too many.
Andrew, Karen’s comments (and those of most others) were more about the article than the book. One shouldn’t be required to read the entire book to form an opinion about the conclusions as they are laid out in the article.
Melanie:
You are right, I had the good fortune as a child myself to have belonged to a community of people who did not discount the faith of a child. I raised my children in a church, in several churches, actually, that did not discount the faith of a child. And I currently attend a church where the youth, of their own accord, sit on the very front pews and routinely provide testatment to the work of God in their lives.
I live in a community that has an active and dynamic Campus Life program. There’s a youth house across the street from the high school — helped paid for by donations from business people in this community. There are coaches, teachers, preachers and others who routinely make serving kids and loving them to Christ part of their daily life.
Are their plenty that are lost? Sure.
Has the church in America lost its own way, choosing too often to emmulate the world instead of Christ? Yes.
But I think we could take a cue from Jordan, Whitney, and be the change we want to see in the world.
We’d all do well to do a little less navel-gazing.
I suspect you are right, though, Ms. Dean and I are likely saying the same thing, different ways.
Thank you for your insights.
[...] to Add: My friend also posted this article as a rebuttle to the first one. That’s more like it. Possibly related posts: [...]
Karen, Anecdotal evidence is a poor basis for generalization. Your proper and joyful affirmation of authentic teen Christians you know is an unreliable basis for discarding information about other teens who need assistance in disentangling their self-serving, culturally received notions of God from the genuine gospel. For what it’s worth, teens aren’t the only ones who view God as a vague benevolent force whose primary value should be measured by how he makes them feel. The teens Dean discusses are symptoms of a larger lie our generation tells itself: using many of the same words as Christians in other eras means our lived convictions and core beliefs are also the same. T’aint so.
I was wondering how you define “Christian?” I mean to say, if being a Christian only requires a teen to do good things with a general faith in humanity, then it would be apparent that yes, those kids are “good Christians.” But perhaps the author you mention defines Christianity more strictly, requiring that faith must be particular, not general; definitive, not vague; rooted in doctrine and then expressed through good works and social consciousness.
This has often been a dividing line between liberal and conservative theology. It’s an old debate, nothing new under the sun! I’m sorry, I’m not a regular reader, and it’s hard for me to tell from this article where you’d stand on that.
Seems to me, it’s quite simple to tell if someone is a “good person.” But defining them as a godly Christian is altogether different, and much more is required than “being good.” Christians ought to be good, yes — but they ought to be a lot more, too. I hope we do good things, but I also hope we will be able to articulate the “why.” It’s the Gospel that saves people, not the acts of good people, kind as they are.
I also hope that makes sense. It’s a lot to ponder, but it’s a worthy subject!
Ouch! As someone who has read both Kenda’s book and Soul Searching, the book by Christian Smith which explains and nuances the findings of this study, I’m rather surprised by this harsh posting concerning the CNN article.
I’m curious as to whether or not you’ve seen Kenda Dean’s response to the article found at: http://kendadean.com/youth-ministry-press/ (as you might guess, CNN didn’t take every quote in context and enjoyed exploiting the word “fake”). The title “Almost Christian” was taken from a great John Wesley sermon which you can find here: http://new.gbgm-umc.org/umhistory/wesley/sermons/2/. I think if you were to look further into this NSYR study you’d be surprised at how thorough and down-to-earth these interviews were.
I’ve had the joy of serving as a youth pastor at both Evangelical and more mainline churches and while I can certainly vouch for the multitudes of faithful, articulate teens who want more from God than just feel-good-therapy, I’m overwhelmingly troubled by those who, despite their years in the church, have difficulty articulating why faith matters. I’m even more concerned about the parents of these teenagers whose biggest spiritual aspiration for their children are for them to attend church were they will be “safe” and grow up to be polite, tax-paying American citizens. I want something more for my kids.
I for one am grateful for this book (and the article, if it points people towards the book) and hope that it will serve as a wake-up call for those entrusted with the spiritual formation of teenagers.
Jenn: Good points. I remember a time when I thought that anyone who wasn’t a Christian didn’t have heart, no compassion, no mercy. I was an adherent to the “us” and “them” mentality that plagued the church. But then I met people who, although not compelled by any faith in Jesus, were doing the most amazing good works — simply because they had heart, compassion, mercy. So faith can’t be defined by works.
It has to be something more than that.
Dorothy Day talks about that tension so much better than I ever could, having come to faith long years after she began her social justice ministry (I have come to believe you can have a ministry void of a dynamic relationship with God).
When her agnostic and atheist friends pressed her about why, after all these years, was she returning to the church — had she lost her ever-loving mind? Day met them with silence.
She remained silent until she says she realized that it was a man who had persuaded her that there was a God. Then she answered, “It is Jesus. I guess it is Jesus Christ.”
Seems like a good enough answer to me, no matter if you are on the liberal or conservative side of theology — It is Jesus ought to be answer enough.
Every man, every woman, every child has to decide for themself whether Jesus will be enough for them.
As a 30-something mother of 2, I believe there is some truth to what Dean is saying. In fact, I was one of these ‘fake christian teens,’ along with most of my friends. The children you talk about are remarkable in their own right and show incredible drive and determination. Even teens who aren’t religious want to make a difference in the world. Growing up, I had no other choice but to attend church, prayer groups, prayer camps, youth groups, youth seminars, etc. It was all forced upon me. I honestly did it because my parents said this is what you have to do in life, and this is what you have to believe in. So I went through the motions. Youth group was social hour and most of my ‘Christian’ friends were having sex, smoking, drinking, stealing, etc. Just as long as we fulfilled what our parents wanted and said a prayer- it was all better. Our youth group leader’s daughter got pregnant at 17 and I remember they bought this to the attention of the entire youth group and church and we all had to put our hands on her and ask that God forgive her and to remove these worldy, secular thoughts from her. Looking back it was so psychotic!
I’ve come to find the Lord again- on my own terms though, not because my parents or the church said I have to, but through my own personal journey. I want an open relationship with my children and I want to show them the ropes in life- to be preventative, to use common sense- like, this is what the reality is and lets make the best decision here. You might get pregnant, you might dabble in drugs, you might make mistakes in life….but no matter what, I still love you and God still loves you. If they tell me, I don’t want to go to Church anymore then that is okay with me! If they say I found my own spiritual path then I will respect that.
Litdawg:
Some people write books purposely designed to divide and group people according to generalities. — all blue t-shirts go there, all reds come over here. Other people write books designed to let us glimpse our nekkid selves before each other. Both ways of writing have value. Neither way is more right than the other. They just serve different purposes.
I have no doubt that Miz Dean’s work will be of great benefit to ministerial staffs nationwide. I hope her insights enable them to encourage more Jordans, more Whitneys, and more Hannahs. (Sorry for the gender bias here, boys, unintentional. I know you young men are out doing equally amazing things.) Meanwhile, I just wanted to say, hey, I think there are plenty of churches and youth pastors and youth organizations that are doing a heckuva job. I love what I see in today’s young people. They get this whole social justice thing in a way that the Jesus Movement generation totally abdicated. Shame on us. If you want to talk about fake Christians you might want to start with the Jesus Movement folks.
Amanda:
If one of your biggest concerns as a staff person was the parents of the teens who greatest desire for their children was for them to attend a church where they are safe, and grow up to be polite, taxpaying American citizens, therein lies the problem. So perhaps the focus should have been about the source of the problem instead of the symptom. Where;s the survey on the parents of these kids?
Where’s the book calling out their faith?
I share your hope that this book and this article will serve as a call for those people to see the Gospel for what it is — a dangerous message to those who seek only to make themselves comfortable.
Faybee:
Can any of us truly find the Lord on our own terms? Faith by it’s very nature requires a submission of ourselves — a letting go of our own terms and a devotion to God’s terms, doesn’t it?
I’ve always maintained that as a parent you can’t give your children something you don’t have. If you want them to have a deep and abiding faith, then have one yourself. If you want them to have a heart of mercy, cultivate your own. If you want them to have a love of reading, turn off the TV and read. If you wan them to be concerned about children in Haiti or Sudan or Iraq, are you?
But sometimes, as is often the case, a parent can make all the wrong choices — they can be neglectful and emotionally distant, they can be selfish and ambitious — and still, if that child has a heart that longs for God, God will be faithful where the parents fail. The church can be a safe haven for children, the way it was for me as a child.
You will not get it right as a parent. You are going to screw up big time. We all do. As parents, as pastors, as youth leaders, we can count on two things — the Cross and the faithfulness of God.
But let’s take care to not diminish the faith of a child, however meager it may appear to us.
I wish that Andrew would have been a little more gracious in his response because what is lost in the rhetoric is a valid critique.
I have had the honor of being one of Dr. Dean’s students. Karen, the one thing I would ask you to consider is that the students that are “true” Christians are few in number and often far in between. I too have read Dr. Dean’s books and Soul Searching. The most frightening things is that the “true” Christians make up only 10% of the teenage population. That leaves a huge hole in the life of the church. The challenge is that the church is made up of more than the 10% and that means that there are a lot of people that are moralistic therapeutic deists running around who claim to be Christians.
We get a skewed perspective on all of this when we spend a majority of our time with the church community. I myself am blessed to be in full-time youth ministry vocationally. One of the greatest challenges I face is getting outside the community so I can spend time with the people who need the love of Christ and equip those who already experience the love of Christ to share it with others.
Josh:
Appreciate your thoughts and insights and yes, of course, we live in a post-Christian era. Nothing new there.
As to perspective, mine may very well be skewed but it’s more from being on the road than being in church.
I get it, though, Josh. I get that Dean’s book is a call to do more than put a finger in the dyke. We are all guilty of playing loosey-goosey with God and our faith and our kids are suffering because of it.
But here’s how I view this — when I’m in the store and see a mother being short with her child, it’s easy to think what a terrible mom she is and how she doesn’t deserve to have that child. Wouldn’t the better question be, how can I help that mother? She’s obviously stressed out.
I can pray for her.
I could say a kind word to her.
If I know her I might offer to give her a break one day this week.
I could cook a meal and take it to her.
Or I could just leave the store and tell everyone I know about her major meltdown.
I suspect what Miz Dean is doing is trying to get folks to ask themselves — how can we be of help?
However, the article made it appear that Miz Dean was being fairly critical of those who may be at their wit’s end after a very hard day. Just my observation.
Can any of us truly find the Lord on our own terms?
Yes. Not on my parents terms. Not on my pastor’s terms. But when I was ready. When only I could really make that decision. That was when I could truly be devoted.
“I’ve always maintained that as a parent you can’t give your children something you don’t have”
And neither will they want something you may have. Despite my parents deep and abiding faith, this was not mine and I sensed that as a teen.
I maintain that Dean has a point because I lived that portion of my life going through the motions. She is not saying ALL teens are fake Christians. Much of them may be like me, just going through the motions.
God Bless.
You, of course, are right. Miz Dean has a point. Hopefully one that will equip teachers and youth pastors and parents to instill and build faith in our youth.
Lord knows with us as role models they need the sort of faith that will move mountains.
Here’s a link to a great synopsis on Dean’s book for those who are interested:
http://ymtoday.com/articles/article.php?aid=2666
You all can also find more about the book at Scot McKnight’s site: http://www.patheos.com/community/jesuscreed/2010/08/31/almost-christian-4/
Karen,
Dean’s point IS to call out parent faith! (The NSYR *did* look at parent faith.) That’s one of the biggest findings of the book: There are so many teens with inconsequential faith in America because there are so many parents that model it for them.
And one of the main culprits that Dean identifies is parental and church adherence to the same kind of religion that you call out in your book, Will Jesus Buy Me A Double-Wide. It’s golden-calf theology mixed with feel-good religion. That’s a big part of the problem.
Karen, take a look at this summary of the book. It goes well beyond the CNN article and presents it in a whole lot more — and correct — detail:
http://ymtoday.com/articles/article.php?aid=2666
Thanks, Andrew, posted below already.
Amanda –
the link to the Wesley sermon was exactly what I was getting at, or trying to. I’m so glad you posted the link, thanks!
Jesus should most certainly be enough. What I wonder sometimes is this — do we know what He is enough FOR? Is he enough to make us feel better about ourselves? Enough to help us do some great things for the world? Or… Is He enough to save our sinful souls (that are still capable of good works) from hell?
Jesus is enough for people who know the depth of their need and know how He provides for their lack. If you believe you are good enough to get to heaven already because your works have earned your status, why would you need ANY Jesus? What’s He “enough” for? Ironically, I think it’s an awareness of sin and lack and weakness that drive one to Jesus…
and defines us forever after.
That was a response to the link — but it may be a bit off topic! Now I want to go read the book.
I trust my LORD and His infallible Word. His promises are true. My prayers are heard. The flock our Jesus blessed us with belong to Him. His covenant children Psm. 103:17-18, Matt. 18:14, Gen 17:7-8, Prov. 2, John 6:47,65. John 9:31, John 10:14, Eph. 1:11-14,17-20, Eph. 2:10. (Many others)
Pray this every day. Col. 1:11-12. Our children are a gift. We know God works through our weaknesses, as parents. God works mightily and changes hearts. Treat them as children of the living God, not pagans. They belong to Him. Believe Him.
Thank you Mrs. K. Zacharias. (loved what Lillian said above.)
Kids walking out their faith? I know many of them. My 20 year old leads a home study group at our church and devotes much time to this effort, he participates in many community service projects, he also plays on the worship team, has covenanted with other men in our church to look after a young widow and her small children (keep up the yard, service the car, make home repairs) and he has become a magnet for troubled teens to come and get wonderful counsel.
My 17 year old also plays on worship team, serves on many community service projects (cutting and collecting firewood for lower income families so that they can heat their homes in the winter etc.). He has a heart for younger children and ministers in that area whenever possible.
My 12 year old also helps in community service projects – he is the first to jump up and help with church activities when asked. They all three respond to help neighbors and others when a helping hand is needed.
Another family with 4 teens that devote Sunday afternoons to playing and singing at nursing homes. Many teens that jumped at the chance to help serve in the kitchen and clean-up for a banquet held in the honor of a young man who had passed away….the stories are never-ending.
I know many such young people who are laying their lives down for others.Why? Because they love Jesus and are passionate about serving Him by serving others.
Thanks for “introducing” us to some more remarkable people, Cheri. I suspect they are modeling what they see lived out before them.
[...] (Editor’s note: For previous post, please go to http://karenzach.com/2010/your-kid-isnt-a-real-christian/) [...]
yes yes yes. certainly, i am concerned about watered-down gospel and churches/parents that aren’t discipling people for the long haul–but i don’t think that trend is especially new or that her conclusions were valid.
her findings were based on the THREE QUARTERS of kids who self-identified as Christians: essentially, kids who celebrate Christmas instead of Hanukkah, NOT those who are faithfully pursuing a deeper relationship with Christ. Christian teens are a minority–not 75% of all kids.
i live/work at a Christian camp with 100+ teens and college kids who are passionate and godly and Kingdom-minded–and who impacted thousands of campers this summer alone. God is doing a tremendous work in and through this generation!
Hi Karen,
I can very much understand where you are coming from and I too spend more time “outside” of the church that your average pastor
The only thing that I would add to the discussion is that Dr. Dean’s critique is leveled at the church as a whole and not individual parents. If there is anyone to blame it is church leadership in the post-Christian era who has acquiesced to letting “it is good to be good and nice to be nice” replace the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Youth ministry has been guilty of this for a long time and this will have a lasting impact on the church.
With regards to parents at their wits end, I can assure you that Dr. Dean has been there quite a bit herself. And one of the things that you’ll find in the work is the acknowledgement that she has come up short in many ways personally and ministerially. I do hope you get a chance to read her book Practicing Passion as it describes the ideal church we should all be striving to become. And one closing thought, the person that Dr. Dean is toughest on is herself. Ten minutes of conversation with her will let you see that
Thanks for the forum and I appreciate that you take the time to respond to each post. That is a credit to your desire to have honest conversations.
Josh: Did you see the folo up post? There’s a link at the bottom of this post.
Thanks for the work you do, girl. And for sharing it with us.
It’s the link to More on Fakes
I know a group of kids, ages 8-21, who right now are walking through the streets of our town giving away pizza, just to connect with people, here, today. The eldest one funded it, but the little ones came up with the idea in Sunday school. They just wanted to let people know Jesus cares about them by sharing their lunch. There’s another group of kids I know, one teen in particular, who see the need of a safe place for the teens in our town to hang out. A drug and alcohol free zone, unlike many homes here, and some adults ready to listen and help. So they spent last year fund-raising and petitioning the government and are well on their way to opening that youth center. I know a group of young people who have for years worked and fundraised to support 2 different orphanages, because if they didn’t, the children wouldn’t have anything to eat. Many have been to those orphanages in Thailand and Haiti, long before it was popular, to serve in those orphanages. One precious girl has gone back on her own several times, working in between to fund it. Once she went back for Christmas, because they wouldn’t know Christmas otherwise. She spent it rocking tiny, sick babies and sharing gifts with the children there. In my town, kids, teens of all ages come out to serve at dinners given for the community, rich and poor alike. Everywhere I look there are teens, or rather young adults, serving the Lord. And they are growing, some just need a little more time.
Thanks, Connie, for sharing the stories of what these kids are doing. So encouraging to hear.
Bingo Josh. Our eternal security is found in relationship with God (through His Christ), not our relationship with an institution. Sadly, we have done much harm for centuries by replacing the former with the latter. LOVE
Lewis had it right — We are so easily sidetracked.